Table Lurker

I love to do my work with some coffee (or tea...or latte..) just as much as the next person, but the difficulty is, where?! Starbucks is so cliché and finding a good coffee joint near you isn't always easy. But lets say, for arguments sake, that you found one. Where to sit? How much work can you get done? Is there enough room for your books?
Right now I am sitting in a little café, writing this, because as I try to do my work I realize that I have no room to. I am sitting on a little stool, at the corner of the bar, with enough room for one of my books (folded back). In other words- no room for my work. 

I am the ultimate café creep, waiting to make my move as soon as somebody thinks it's safe to leave their little table, I will pounce. The only problem in my "Operation Table" is the newbys that keep walking into the café, looking for a seat in the already full house. I already had to stalk down my prey for this bar seat, how am I supposed to strike for the table? I need a plan of execution. 
I am now the table lurker. I will circle around and around, which will show my interest in your table. I will give you a look or two, to let you know you are on my radar, and that I am desperate and in need of your table. I have to gauge your response to my lurking though, are you getting defensive over my "a little too close" walking patterns, or are you showing some pity on my predicament? 

I can see if you are taking pity on me by your eyes, thats my first clue. The eyebrows will arch up if you are debating if you have done enough work for the day and are willing to give up your table to a person in need, or if you break my eye contact right away you are telling me to back the hell off your table. Reading your signs correctly is my job. Yours is to give me the right signs.

Table lurking is easier when you first enter a joint, and haven't already found a seat. Currently, I am at the difficult stage, the "Table Hop". The pity card won't work in this stage, because I am looking for a new table for my own comfort. People think that I should be grateful I have a seat because other people in the café don't. I am not their first pick in the table auction. I have to work for this. 
This is where the reflection of my computer comes into play. Sitting against a wall, it makes it look like I am not interested in finding a new seat, since I am already tucked away in a corner, no one even thinks I am on the radar for this table hunt. This is where I have my advantage. For the seconds hesitation that it takes the lurker to make its move on the departing table, I will stand up, and swoop in by leaving an item of mine at the table. The moment where someone is just putting on their jacket is critical. This moment is when it is acceptable to swoop in and ask the person if they are leaving (which they obviously are). You will take the lurker by surprise, and although they wanted the seat you just stole, they will settle for the open seat you just left. (If you really want to get under their skin, smile, and suggest the new seat that just opened up behind you...where you just were.) Remember when I said I was at the bar earlier? I am at the table now. Execution worked. Lurkers took my old seat at the bar, and they can now begin the new process.

 My next victim? The booth seat behind me.